A book on multiple pregnancy

Che and i went to Market! Market! yesterday to have dinner and stroll around for few minutes. Surprisingly, i don't like going to the mall anymore. I don't like walking around not knowing what exactly to buy. I'd rather be at home and take a rest.

We went to the National Bookstore just taking our chances if we can see a book on multiple pregnancy. It will be fun to read more about having twins. I saw this:

When You're Expecting TWINS, TRIPLETS or QUADS (Proven Guidelines for a Healthy Multiple Pregnancy) by Dr Barbara Luke and Tamara Eberlein

We didn't buy it though (umiral ang kakuriputan ko). It costs more than P1000. I asked Che to check it out at BookSale first. Unfortunately, i was told today that they don't have it so i'm leaning towards buying it anyway.

Well, we bought a Baby Names Book on our way out. This is our second baby names book. It has more names on it. 45,000 i think. So if you wanna check out the meaning of your name or would like me to check out some name suggestions for you, just holler!

Morning Sickness, Nausea and Headaches

I read in Dionne's and Angie's blog that they suffer from gas. Fortunately, it didn't struck me. Having sympthoms of pregnancy, though difficult and definitely not pleasing, is fine with me. At least i can enjoy my pregnancy - not sure if 'enjoy' is the right word here but it sure reassures me that i am pregnant and things are still kinda normal.

Morning sickness is definitely not occuring only during mornings. It can struck you anytime of the day. For me, there are times that it was worst but after my first ultrasound last Apr 14, for whatever reasons, my morning sickness and nausea subsided. I still do get it sometimes, around 1 or 2 times a day. I don't mind vomiting really as once you throw up, it's done, you feel relieved (and for me, that means i can eat again hehe). Prior pregnancy, i rarely vomit. I find it difficult. Maybe i can even count in one or two hands how many times it occured to me in my entire life. And now, i think i am getting to be an expert on this. Yuck! :)

Lately, i have also been having headaches (like now). I don't like it really. Despite my doctor said that it's ok to take paracetamol, i still don't. I just rest and have a cold compress. I don't know exactly if this is related to pregnancy although i had about 4 or 5 headaches since last week. I have suspicion that it could also be due to my eye grade or the hot climate. But for today, i just stayed the entire day in the office and still got a headache.

I do not crave for anything even if i want to. One thing is for sure though, if i thought of something good to eat, i should have it today or the next day. Not having it makes me want it more. :)

I had my worst nightmare

There were instances in the past that i dreamt so vividly on a death of a relative or a thrilling scene where someone is chasing after me. The one i had last night i think was the worst ever.

I dreamt that i slipped in the bathroom and my buttocks fell on the floor. I thought it was nothing until i saw pink discharge and i panicked. Che rushed me to the hospital and while inside the car, water gushed out from me with my two tiny little babies. They were about an inch in size. I was crying my heart out. Che was mad and blaming me for not taking care of myself. Then another image flashed into me that Daddy Che was with my twins, a boy and a girl, sitting inside the plane. I was even mortified when i found out their gender and i have never felt that guilty in my entire life. Until boom... i woke up! It was just a dream. Everything felt so real. I immediately woke up Che and told him that i miscarry in my dream and that i am so scared.

I went to the bathroom as Che accompanied me. I was holding his hand walking in our living room in the dark. I was extra careful of myself. When we returned in bed, i faced the wall and cried. I was still terified. But i tried to keep it to myself so Che wouldn't notice. Suddenly he cuddled me and told me everything will be fine. It was just a dream. In his arms, i cried again.

I have never felt this so emotionally attached in a dream. I have never felt so scared to lose someone this much. I have never felt more guilty.

I wonder how many pregnant women experience this?

I hope this doesn't mean anything but just a pure anxiety and a fear of losing my babies which i love so dearly even at this early stage.

This serves a lesson to take care of myself more...

I have an excuse

I have always been lazy particularly doing household chores. But i got better especially when we just moved in to Merville. Syempre excited and i also need to because we have family and friends visiting us. However, these past few weeks, i have been really so lazy- as in TAMAD! There are few weekends that i just spent lying in bed. Household chores i.e. cleaning the house, laundry, ironing, gardening etc have all been neglected. I am glad i have my husband who can do the laundry, and sometimes cook dinner, aside from his assigned task of showering our plants. :)

What makes my katamaran worse is that i have now an excuse. And sometimes i find myself really hating it and feeling guilty that Che has to do all these things (although he never complains).

Nakakatamad maging tamad!!!

The joys and fears of pregnancy

Pregnancy is like a roller coaster ride. You can be ecstatic at one point and anxious at the same time.

I can't explain the joy and excitment Che and I are going thru right now. It's even greater to know that your family and friends also can't contain their happiness to see the 2 bundle of joy we will soon be having. Both families actually offered their houses for our stay when i'm due so they can take care of the twins. It's a great feeling to know your husband can take care of you so much - even much more than what you think you deserve.

How can you be SO in love with someone you haven't even met? What more when the time comes that you can hold them in your arms?

Why, more than ever, you dread the sight of blood? How can you be SO afraid to lose someone even though they are too tiny to feel their presence?

How can you be so selfless knowing that two people are inside you depending so much on what you do and eat?

Expecting a child can be an overwhelming time in your life..

..and now i comprehend.

New toy for mommy and the twins

I attended a seminar in Singapore last week and bought my new ipod video! I've been wanting this before despite the fact that i'm not musically inclined. But i now have an excuse as i need to listen to some songs for my babies as they grow. Yep, excuses, excuses! *Wink*

Anyway, Che and I are enjoying it. Especially that i was so addicted watching Desperate Housewives on it. Ok. ok... i should listen to children's songs and classical music for the kids which the ipod is really intended for. :)

What to expect when you're expecting

It's been a LOOONG while since i last updated my blog (I had to create one as i can no longer access my old blog). It was such a fun and truly exciting time we had a year after the wedding. How i wish i could summarize it all here but maybe will do it bit by bit next time. But wait, something is really worth blogging!

As our family and friends know, i am expecting. The news came out last March 20 thru this...

It was 2 days after my birthday. Such a wonderful post birthday gift! As the days go by, dressing up is really so depressing! Nothing could fit me now! I admit i gained a lot of weight after the wedding (12-14 lbs to be exact) and plus the pregnancy, i should expect to gain more! Tsk. Tsk. Nausea and feeling sick almost everyday struck me especially since last week. Last Apr 14, we got another news. This was the result of my first ultrasound!
Tada! Yep, they're TWINS!!!

In the ultrasound room, the two ladies were kinda whispering 'multple' but then i didn't know what they were talking about as i was facing opposite the screen. The lady then called another doctor. She asked me if it was my first baby. Shyly I said 'Yes'. She then asked if i took a fertility medicine, i said 'Yes, clomid.'. She asked me again if i have history of twins in the family. I said 'Yes, have first cousins who are twins. (both my mom and dad's side)'. Then i sort of got a clue. I asked, 'Why po, are you seeing twins?' Until the doctor said 'Yes, you are carrying twins!' And both have heartbeat! Whoa!!

It was a mixed emotion. I nearly cried.

They asked me to wait again and repeat the ultrasound with an OB specialist. I had another ultrasound - this time an abdominal ultrasound. The doctor said, 'This is just to see if you are only getting two or maybe more.' What the F***! Well, the good thing is, they still saw two tiny babies inside me. Whew! That was such a relief!

I admit i have been sort of hoping that we will have twins. Few days ago, i was even searching in the internet on how to know if you're carrying twins. :) Mind you, i even took the online quiz to know my chances of having twins! :) About a week or two ago, Che and I were also joking for possible names in case we'll be having twins. He thought of Jack and Poy, or Jack and Jill or Thumb and Thacs! :)

Indeed, God is sooo good. We asked for one, we were given two! He never fails to surprise us with blessings more than what we have hoped for!